My 6 Year Old Hits Me When He Is Angry Are You Dealing With Recession-Fueled Stress and Anxiety?

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Are You Dealing With Recession-Fueled Stress and Anxiety?

What seems like a lifetime ago, I walked out of the office of my busy psychotherapy practice after firing the secretary and throwing my bee (cell phone days) in the trash. I had hit the wall of burnout and I didn’t know how I got there.

I had a good habit, a nice home, and money in the bank. Raising my son as a single mother seemed fine and, on the outside, everything must have seemed fine. The interior for me was another story.

Despite having a busy routine, I never felt that:

  • enough patients
  • enough money
  • enough of anything

My stress level was off the top and my workaholic behavior was showing. With the help of wise counsel I was able to look within and see what was driving this behavior and my stress.

With all the uncertainty in our country today, due to job losses, financial losses, lifestyle changes, and just not knowing from day to day what will happen next, many of us living a stressful life. The damage to our physical, mental and emotional health is increasing and some are ready to throw it all away like I once did.

My own experience, and years of working with others, have helped me see why some people handle stress better than others. I’m sure many times our stress response is learned at a very young age.

Many of our most important beliefs are in place by the time we are five or six years old. How we see our world… as a safe or dangerous place, how we see ourselves in relation to our world, how effective our parents were in teaching problem solving and governing the curves of our lives.

What did you learn? It is sometimes difficult to remove early beliefs because they are what drive our “automatic pilot” behavior.

  • Fear may be the reason you keep a job you hate because you believe you will never be able to find another one and you fear what would happen if you didn’t.
  • You may witness angry or abusive behavior or you may have experienced such behavior as a child. What would be your stressful reactions to unknown or unexpected situations?

I have learned that we all have two or three deeply held beliefs that guide many of our decisions when we are under stress. It helps to do some personal work and try to get these beliefs out if we are trying to get our weight under control.

  • Take a look at your belief system about your self-worth, whether you deserve success, love or happiness.
  • Check if you need each person’s consent. If so, you are always under stress.

Here are some of my tips for handling stress. Take a minute or two and see if one of these will improve your outlook today.

Acknowledge your loss.

Don’t try to hide your feelings about job loss, less income, or lifestyle change. Any change or crisis is painful and it is much more human to feel the loss and express it. Overcome rejection and “walk through the pain”. You will be stronger for the next challenge. Remember that anger and blame hide the deeper feelings, linked to deep beliefs of failure and regret.

Develop a support network.

No one heals alone. You must be willing to let others help you through difficult times. Friendship and support can only come if you are willing to find out.

After the pain, blame and hurt, be willing be responsible for your part of the problem.

You may have been a victim of the situation or there may be things you could have done to avoid the crisis, job loss or financial loss. Either way, you now have a choice on how to create your future. Learn from your mistakes and vow to be better next time.

Start planning how you want your future to look.

Live one day at a time but have a vision for what you want next. Write it down, be specific, put it away for now. Check it once or twice a week. See your progress.

Above all, when stress hits, and it does, put into action. Ask yourself the proverbial question: what can I do for myself right here, right now that will make me feel better? Is it a walk, a touch, a conversation with a friend or loved one, a spiritual connection? Decide what, then do it! Before things get better, they will look better if you do this.

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