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Why Can’t My Son Find A Girlfriend – Is That A Question On Your Mind?
It’s hard to watch your son go through hard times. If you’ve ever asked yourself “why can’t my son find a girlfriend?” then I have a few possible reasons that we discussed on the dating radio show for women that I hosted.
By the way, the tips here are rated G. Our goal is to get good women and good men into long-term relationships, so you won’t get any sex talk here!
Is your son a “nice guy?”
That’s a great attribute, but could he be too nice? We have guys on our show who are too happy to be with women. Everyone around them is surprised that they don’t have a girlfriend because they would treat someone so well. The problem is that such “nice guys” want to do too much, too quickly for the object of their affections.
Put it this way, how about you walk into your local car dealership and tell them you’ll pay anything for that new car you just saw on the lot? Think you’ll get your best deal on the day?
Same with women.
If he tells her (by his actions) that no matter what he will “pay” to be with her, even the nicest girl will walk all over him and bore him.
In life you don’t get what you deserve, you get what you NEGOTIATE.
Is your son the best he can be?
Does he take care of his mind and body with equal vigor? Women want a guy who can talk about things outside of sports, and while he doesn’t have to be a supermodel, in our visual society, he stands a better chance with MORE women if he’s fit, clean, and wears cool clothes.
You see, dating is a lot like selling. The better your product is, the more likely it is to sell. It’s not that you can’t sell with a limited selection, but it makes it more difficult.
Put it this way, if you have 2 grocery stores next to each other and one has the basics and the other has the basics plus a seafood stand, a deli that bakes its own bread and other amenities, which store has a better chance of making more. sale?
Being able to be the best helps him meet more women. Out of 100 women, maybe 20 are interested in what he’s like now, but he could increase that number to 40 if he’s in good shape and wears nice clothes. It’s not a guarantee, but I like his odds better with 40 women to 20!
Is he too serious about women?
As Cyndi Lauper said in 1985, “Girls just wanna have fun.” Remember that song? This applies to dating and relationships with women. We tell guys all the time to keep it light and funny when dating. She wants to laugh and have a good time on a date.
If your son doesn’t have that personality, encourage him to study comedy, rent Cary Grant movies (who was the most romantic figure in movie history), and take improv or comedy classes.
Is he a mystery and a challenge?
This ties into the “nice guy” entry from the front of the article. Women love to WONDER about a guy they’re interested in. We tell guys not to tell girls anything personal about themselves on a date and to wait 5 to 9 days between dates before calling them. We also tell them NOT to ask for a date on a date.
Basically, you want her to do most of the talking, laugh a lot, and then wonder if your son will ever call again! Her level of interest in a guy naturally rises, which she can’t understand and is hard to get.
Is he a gentleman?
Eyes were on him. Pull out the chair. Walk outside. Hold the door open for her. No sexual comments. Make her laugh (see how important this is since I mentioned it again?).
Also, he has to be strong enough to say no. If she’s giving him static and he knows he’s being played, he needs to stand up for himself. Too many guys are just happy to be with her because they are attracted to her. If I show respect, I expect respect. A good woman will appreciate that she can’t walk all over your son.
Guys have lost the art of chivalry these days, but good girls still want a gentleman!
Too many compliments and gifts?
He is allowed 2 compliments. When he picks her up, he can tell her that she looks nice. When he drops her off, he can tell her he had a fun time. Tell him not to give flowers, candy or anything like that.
Listen, I want to give compliments, flowers, candy, thoughtful cards, and other forms of affection to a woman if she’s my girlfriend, fiance, or wife. However, IN THE INITIAL stages of dating, compliments and gifts are seen as a weak attempt to buy her affection.
If excessive gifts and compliments really worked, then every smooth-tongued rich guy would be in a happy relationship and poor, shy guys would be forever single.
Remember, she is not responding to your son FORGIVING her an excessive amount of things, whether it’s his attention or gifts. She wants to laugh, have fun, but also WONDER how many women are chasing your son.
Is he putting himself in the right position to meet women?
Does he play online on Friday nights and then go to a nightclub on Saturday and a sports bar on Sunday? These might be the wrong places to meet great women.
Online dating, speed dating, volunteer events, wine tasting, cooking classes, dance classes are all good ways to meet great women. Also, under these circumstances, you are more likely to get to know her as a person, and of course we want your son to be with a woman who has a flexible and giving personality that is clinically sound!
If you’ve ever asked yourself, “why can’t my son find a girlfriend,” then I hope this article helped you.
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